As a recently engaged guy I’m now acting as a support (and hopefully helpful) role to my lovely fiancée. While flipping through endless magazines and Pinterest boards we’ve together mutually agreed on a few abominations that seem to keep cropping up at weddings that’ll we’ll never do.
In no particular order here are five things you should avoid at all costs.
1. Giant Pieces of Typography Saying “Love”
How did the conversation for this one go? “At my wedding I want the words ‘love’ littered around, because I want people to really know we’re in love.”
Did you know a study found that guests didn’t realise the two people getting married are in love unless they’re confronted by giant faux-wooden words saying “LOVE” everywhere? That’s actually a lie, there is no study, and things saying “LOVE” and “Just Married!” at the wedding are just a little bit naff.
2. Let The Chick In the Red Dress Pole Dance
Self explanatory. She really does bring the house down.
3. A Themed Wedding
You want to know how to hate your younger self? Have a themed wedding. Make it about something that will look really terrible in a few years. Like Minecraft. Or Batman. This isn’t a 6 year olds birthday party.
4. Cheap Photographer
You get what you pay for, and about the only thing you’ll take away from your wedding is a pile of debt, a lovely wife, and some memories in the form of .jpgs.
5. Invite Everyone Via Facebook
Want to never know whether anyone is going to show up? Get ready for a million “maybes” and a bunch of people who could not be bothered getting around to ticking a box. It isn’t a BBQ, lay the pressure on and send those envelopes.