Kiwi Study Finds The Ins And Outs of Dating As and With Single Parents

Next week is Single Parents’ Day, I’m not sure who invented it but I don’t need much of an excuse to celebrate something so I’m not going to complain.

In New Zealand single parent families represent about 20% of all families. According to the 2013 census this percentage was highest in Gisborne where the number was up to well over a quarter at 27.8%.

A new survey by EliteSingles dove into the complicated dynamics of dating when there’s a kid involved and came out with some interesting results using a sample of 300 kiwis. Right off the bat though, 90% of kiwi’s don’t mind dating someone that came bundled with a child. So if you were put off from getting into the dating scene because of a misconception that you were somehow damaged goods, put that one to rest, it’s a myth. What’s more, 69% of singles agreed that having a positive relationship with a partner’s children makes them love their partner more. Also 21% of singles say that they’re even more inclined to go on a date with someone who has a photo with their kids in their profile.

If you’re the one dating a single parent, be ready to put some effort into impressing their kids – 68% of parents with children younger than 18 would want their seal of approval before getting deeply involved with a partner. Parents with grown-up children aren’t as rigid: just 44% want their children’s approval while 56% agree with the statement ”it’s none of my children’s business who I date.”

On the whole, though, it’s single mums who are much more influenced by their children’s opinion, with 75% of those who parent under-18s saying they wouldn’t date someone unless their children liked them. Only 58% of men surveyed shared the same attitude.

The research also reveals that the majority of single parents (78%) would wait until in a serious partnership to introduce their kids to their new partner. Once introduced though, the bonding begins: a huge 93% of Kiwis say that doing family activities with a partner’s children and their own plays a crucial part in building a stronger relationship.

Single fathers are more likely than single mothers to seek their kids’ help when dating online. When writing a dating profile, 23% of dads would want their child’s advice (compared with 20% of mums).

When it comes to offline dating however, single mothers are the ones happiest to seek help from the kids – 32% of single mums would ask their kids for general advice on what to wear and where to go, compared with 26% of single dads.

So if you were wondering whether you should get back into the dating scene and the kids were holding you back, maybe it’s time to reconsider?


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