The 8 Most Messed Up Things People Have Overheard

We’ve all heard snippets of messed up stories that make you wonder how insane some peoples lives must be. eavesdropping is a fun activity, it’s one step up from people watching and one step behind being a peeping tom. It’s a fine balance, that’s all I’m saying.

The AskReddit subreddit asked users to give their juiciest and most messed up overheard conversations. The stories that follow definitely don’t disappoint!

Spy Kids

My husband and I were at McDonalds. We took our son to the Playplace to try to let him burn off energy so we could finish grocery shopping.

Where did your dad sit at the spring concert? Who did he sit by? Did he sit by Masons mom?

A mother was in there with her 3 kids. One by one she would make each one of them sit down and was interrogating them. “Where did your dad sit at the spring concert? Who did he sit by? Did he sit by Masons mom? Did he talk to any of the other moms? Was he laughing and smiling when he talked to Carters mom? Did you guys come right home afterwards?”

She was writing it all down. Each child was not allowed to go play unless they answered her questions.

A Mother’s Love

When I was a little kid, like 5 years old, I really wanted this stupid stamp set in the Family Dollar. My mom and I walked there for her to buy tampons. we found both in the clearance bin. I overheard her talking to the lady at the cash register (when price checking them) about how she only had money for one of the items and that she was going to buy me the stamp set over the tampons that she needed. I’m 21 now and I never told my mom that I heard that. She always pretended that we had enough money, but she would skip meals or give up her stuff to make sure we had enough and it breaks my heart to think about it. I know it’s not super fucked up but still.

Father Christmas Is Selective

I was listening to two of my Kindergarten students talk about Christmas the day before break. One asked “Do you believe in Santa?”. The other replied “Yes, but he doesn’t come to my house because I’m in foster care.”

Scottish Terriers

I’ve been bitten in the nuts by two separate Scottish terriers…

I’ve never wanted to chase someone down the street and ask to hear the rest of the story so bad in my life 🙁

Bad Teacher

First off, I wear hearing aids. When I was in elementary school, I had a Mic that was on a necklace and my teacher would wear it. It transmits to my hearing aid! Anyways she was talking about her weekend out drinking and sleeping with strangers.. It was worst when she realized she left the Mic on.

Puberty

Worked at a summer camp for a few years, I’m convinced kids don’t realize you can hear them even when you’re in the same room literally three feet away unless you’re looking directly at them. Best conversation I ever heard was between two nine year olds.

if I had armpit hair I’d shave it off and glue it on my face..

Kid 1: my brother is totally going through puberty and he’s only eleven!

Kid 2: lucky!

Kid 1: I know he even has armpit hair!

Kid 2: if I had armpit hair I’d shave it off and glue it on my face..

Kid 2: thats… that’s…. a great idea!

Me: ???

Not the Whole Way

Sitting behind two teenagers on the train:

Guy: “You let him cum inside of you?!”

Girl: “Well not all the way.”

I finally understand teen pregnancy…

Beans Aren’t Potatoes

I was photographer at a wedding and while the bride was getting ready I heard 2 bridesmaids (mid 20’s) talking. One said to the other about how she had recently found out that beans (probably as in the baked variety), were not bits of potato as she had always thought.

They’re fucking beans!

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